Jaws by Ralph
Now today we're going to visit some of the actual spots where back in 1974 that bad old shark Jaws devoured all those poor innocent islanders. Our first item of interest on your port-side is the home of Amity's own Chief of Police Martin Brody,Now Brody really did blow up that shark and became a legend in his own time. Roy Schneider played him in that little movie they made about our shark episode. How many of you saw the film Jaws? Well luckily you just saw the film, we actually had to live through that-
Base, Oh my, Amity 3 is sinking out by the old lighthouse ( and I don't see any survivors....I don't know what could have done this except for a...SHARK!
Base: Uh, Amity 6, Uh repeat that!?
Shark, It's the biggest one I've ever seen! Oh man, he's going under the boat, Base what do we do?!
Ermm...try the grenade launchers, over.
You mean these things are loaded?! (That's what she said)
*SHOOTS AND MISSES, CAUSES WATER EXPLOSION*
Dang I missed.
*SHOOTS AND CLUMSILY MISSES AGAIN CAUSING WATER EXPLOSION*
Shoot! I missed again! Base we're going to hide out in the Boathouse until Chief comes, over.
*ENTER BOATHOUSE*
Hmmm, is there anyone in here? *SOUNDS*
Oh that's him! We gotta get out of here! Oh no! It won't drop into gear! COME ON! THIS ISN'T FUNNY! COME ON!
*SOUNDS, WATER BARREL TIPS AND DESTROYS PERSON SITTING FAR RIGHT IN ROW 6*
GOT IT! LET'S GET OUT OF HERE!
*JAWS POPS UP*
WOAAAAHHHHH!!! Man, we gotta get back to land!
Amity 6, this is Chief Brody, I'm on my way, I'll be there in 10 minutes.
10 minutes?!! WE'LL BE SHARK BAIT IN 10 MINUTES! Oh where is he?! I don't see him!
*JAWS POPS UP AND SOMEHOW CAUSES THE GAS DOCK TO EXPLODE AND ALSO GAS TO LEAK INTO THE WATER CREATING A FIREBALL AND INFERNO ON THE WATER SURFACE* The skipper shoots the gas dock :thumbs:
Oh man...we gotta go for it!
*INTENSE ACTION MUSIC PLAYS AS WE NEAR THE FLAMES AND THEY SUDDENLY DISAPPEAR BECAUSE THE FIRE KNOWS WE MEAN BUSINESS*
There we go, we can unload on that old fishing dock over there one at a time. Remember to watch out for that high voltage barge. We should be okay unless -
*FIN POPS UP IN THE DISTANCE AS WE NEAR DANGEROUS HIGH VOLTAGE BARGE WITH CABLE*
Here he comes!
*JAWS POPS UP ON ROW 4 AND SOMEHOW CAUSES STEAM, IT ALSO SPARKS A LOT AND HE DIES AND GOES BACK TO HIS PIT IN THE UNDERWORLD, UNDERWATER*The shark bites the underwater cable :thumbs:
Is everybody okay? *looks at dead Jaws* Oh that thing is disgusting! We really roasted him!
*JAWS POPS UP ONCE AGAIN TO GIVE A FINAL SCARE EVEN THOUGH HE JUST DIED, SKIPPER SHOOTS AND DOESN'T MISS THIS TIME BECAUSE OF PROXIMITY TO THE SHARK*
Amity 6, are you okay?
Base...
Amity 6, are you alright!?
Chief...
CALL OFF THE MARINES, WE'RE COMING HOME!!!!
Hey everybody, please keep quiet about this little shark episode because if word got out, that would be it for Captain Jake's and the rest of the businesses around here, after all, WE DID GET HIM DIDN'T WE?! So I'd like to thank you for helping me conquer the menace of Jaws and have a FINTASTIC rest of your day at Universal Studios Florida! Also don't forget to check out Universal 360, starting at 9:45 in the lagoon!
Fin.